I was talking to a friend yesterday who is also a mentor about the year that was, the sleeplessness and the sickness, the feeling of being underwater all the time and the heartache of watching life slip by whilst feeling like an empty shell.
I told her how the bug I got overseas had eaten a hole through my nose (on the inside, about the size of your little finger!) and that I was really scared that the kids would be affected as well. I very rarely feel parent guilt – I know Im a great dad – but there has definitely been some feelings of guilt and “poor me” that have come as a result of this.
What if something does happen to one of the kids from our decision to go overseas when they were so young? What if this bug eats the middle of my 13 month old son’s nose and affects his breathing his whole life? Will I ever be able to get over the guilt of that? The trauma and gut wrenching personal responsibility that every parent suffers when their child experiences hurt from our decisions or actions.
I was having this thought and feeling just now… and it moved me to tears where I write this.
One of the beliefs that Stace and I have really adopted and tried to embody since we started our entrepreneurial journey – something that we learned from this particular friend of ours – is the idea that
Everything is perfect and exactly as it should be.
Anyone who has built a business knows its tough. Lots of hours, late nights, failures, losses, rejection, spending money that doesnt come back. Nights staring at the ceiling wondering if you’ve made the right choice, to commit to building this passion based biz… or whether you should just take the easy route and go back to your well paid comfortable job.
One thing we found though (and this applies to weight loss in a BIG way) was that often it had nothing to do with what was “happening” in the biz, but more what we chose to BELIEVE about it.
When we first began there were long periods where nothing sold… LONG periods! And even at our peak we still had programs that didnt sell and cost us money. Many times we thought about giving up.
But when we shifted our inner story to the idea that everything happens as it should and is exactly what we need – everything got easier.
The failures were easier…
It was easier to take and knock and just get up and go again the next day…
It didnt change the situation of course! It didnt magically put money in our bank or “manifest” new clients for us or anything like that.
But what it did was allow us to operate with total clarity and total mental and emotional FREEDOM each and every day.
Instead of spending a day or a week whinging and bitching and indulging stories about “its not fair… why does it have to be so hard… we’re good people… we try so hard… boo hoo…” It gives us the clean slate to simply make the best choice THAT DAY and each day after.
It also doesnt mean IGNORING the situation. I am absolutely NOT talking about burying your head in the sand and thinking happy panda bear rainbow thoughts… We were never waiting for the universe to take care of us… while sitting on our butts and watching tv.
You never make good choices when you are affected by doubt or shame or guilt or fear. You will run to what your mind tells you is SAFE, rather than to what your heart says is truly right and aligned for you.
You’ve probably experienced this with your weight loss before? Have you ever started a new diet that worked a little at first, but when suddenly in week 2 or 3 the scales go back up a little – you stop. Abandon ship. Fall off the bandwagon and run, petrified, back to the diet that wasnt even working how you wanted it to before, but that you knew was safe.
The diet that you KNOW wont work, but that at least you wont get any worse?
Dont worry, youre not alone.
Getting into awesome shape as a parent is tough. You have limited time due to work and family, you have less energy and there’s lots of boring routine.
Plus, if youre like most women, you think that your needs come last (we will talk about that another time!)
We speak to women all the time that start fresh on Monday, eat something “off plan” on Tuesday –
And abandon their new program for the rest of the week. “Oh well, Ive stuffed up… so now i will just do whatever until next Monday”. Like somehow next Monday they will suddenly be blessed with new levels of will power!!
So next time you find yourself suffering the mental chatter that follows a “bad decision”, CHOOSE to accept the belief that everything is perfect and as it should be. That the cake you just ate was not only ok, but a NECESSARY part of your journey.
DONT bury your head in the sand and pretend that you can just eat bread and cake and pasta every day of the week and continue to lose weight – that aint gonna work!
But INSTANTLY drop the mental and emotional anguish that comes with that situation, and be free to make the choice you KNOW you need to next.
It makes the journey EASY.
Its what Im choosing to do today.
If you want to lose weight… fast.. and with ease AND you know that you need to make some inner shifts as well as the food and exercise –
Then our book The Unstoppable Body will be the most important book you read – ever!
Not only does it tell you how to work out WHAT to eat, WHEN to eat and HOW MUCH to eat –
It helps you to make the inner shifts… the mental and emotional transformations that are ESSENTIAL to creating lasting weight loss.
Coz heres the thing –
If you just focus on food and exercise –
And dont shift your beliefs towards success –
It wont ever last.
You will ride the weight loss merry-go-round for the next 5, 10 or 20 years…
Let us show you a better way… click here